So obviously I recap The Bachelorette. If you are reading this, you probably know that already. I’ve done it for a few years now and it’s no secret that I do so as a way to make fun of the contestants. I’ve gotten some weird comments over the years, but I got a comment last night that kind of took the cake in terms of not knowing how to feel about it.

I don’t want to be one of those people who freak out when someone disagrees with them. In a similar sense to people on TV, I put my thoughts and views out there and the hope is that people like them and agree with them. HOWEVER, the reality exists that people won’t agree and voice their dissent. If I’m in for the agreement and affirmation, then I have to be in for the dissent as well. That’s only fair.

But here are my points of respectful contention with Marie:

A) She calls me a bully.

Labeling someone a bully implies some kind of superiority over those that are being bullied. I’m not better looking, I’m probably not more wealthy, I’m certainly not as famous and in terms of intelligence, I do write a weekly recap of what THEY do, so we’ll call it a push in that sense. So, calling me a bully is a bit of a misappropriation.

B) She’s defending the humanity of the people on the show.

I don’t know. I guess they are just humans. But why do we have to defer to people who are self-obsessed just because they are on a show supposedly about love? I don’t think they deserve that.

To me, there’s a very vivid difference between the humanity of the people on The Bachelorette vs. the people who are on The Biggest Loser. There’s no shortage of support for the people on The Biggest Loser because they deserve our support. The people on The Bachelorette? Don’t they deserve our disdain? They aren’t doing anything them to better themselves. They are trying to better the measure of fame they have/can get.

C) Moreover, she’s defending a show that looks to bastardize the concept of love.

I don’t want to be preachy or overly dramatic, but in a certain sense, the show is pretty insulting. On a fundamental level, it’s a bit of an assault on our intelligence that we believe this show to be a proven model in terms of finding love. And it’s insulting if you are in a relationship or marriage where you are committed and in love.  To pretend that love can be actualized from some exotic trips and like 12 total hours of personal interaction is at best ignorant and at worst, aggressively and obnoxiously stupid.

I think that’s what is annoying. I’ve been with my wife since we were 17 and building our relationship together has been hard. It’s been hard and that’s for two people who are perfectly matched together and have spent years getting to know each other and refining our ability to work together and communicate. But then this show is like, Naw that’s all obsolete. We can figure it out with a few roses and some awkwardly contrived date sequences.

I don’t know. If I was going to have a human moment right now, I would talk about how it’s also annoying that I can spend a lot of time writing something, working on something and investing myself in something and an anonymous reader can trivialize it with a terse comment suggesting dodgy logic. I’m so glad that I’m not having a human moment about it though.

How have you ever been a bully?