When we were last with Team Ricktator, they were kind of making new friends, but kind of not because Ricktator was killing them all. Also, Lori was trying to suffocate Herschel with her mouth or something and Carl and his stupid
face hair were being awesome by going on solo surprise runs like it was NBD.
First scene of this week and it’s a helicopter with military guys in it?
The helicopter is like “Turbulence” and then the pilot is like “lol fixed it.” And then the helicopter is like “MORE Turbulence” and the pilot is like “Uh oh.” And then the helicopter is like “Crash” and PAN BACK and Andrea is like “What’s all that dark smoke that is probably from a downed helicopter?”
And Michonne is like “….” because she never says anything, right? And her zompets are like, “BRGRGHRGHRGHRGHRG” (Because they don’t have jaws – obvi) and so Andrea, Michonne and the zompets make a beeline for the dark cloud of smoke.
Back from commercial and Michonne and Andrea have found the downed chopper and then Andrea vomits because we need to remember that she’s still sick, but honestly, she looks like death and she has a blanket around her. I would have been fine if she would have just had a warm cup of Chicken Noodle in front of her (Implausible? Maybe. But I totally buy Michonne somehow providing it.).
One guy has literally been cut in half from the crash so things aren’t looking awesome for him. As Michonne explores, some other crew rolls up like it’s a rap video. They have bows and guns and aluminum bats and seem super thorough so Michonne and Andrea go chill mode and hide in the bushes with the zompets.
This new crew deals with the situation and is rescuing the pilot and then Michonne’s zompets get like REAL rowdy and restless so Michonne swords their heads off, NBD and the new crew is like, “It’s cool.”
But just when everyone is about to go on about their lives, someone makes Michonne and Andrea (Andronne? Michondrea?) and they turn around and IT’S MERLE OMG. AND HE HAS A ROBOT HAND OR SOMETHING. It’s a crude robot hand, I guess? It’s not even crude. It’s a super primitive can opener with a knife on it or something.
Andrea is not thrilled and she says something like, “I’m sick, we got no food, MICHONNE’S ZOMPETS HEADS ARE FALLING OFF” and then she passes out and Merle and the Governor take Michondrea to Camp Governor because she’s super sick or something.
Back from commercial and Michondrea are in the infirmary and totally being interrogative about EVERYTHING and the nurse is being all mysterious like she doesn’t want to answer anyhting but then Merle busts in with his super crude robot hand is like, “MEMBER THAT TIME RICK CUFFED ME TO THE ROOF WITH THE NET RESULT BEING THAT I LOST MY HAND?” And then he held up his stumpy hand to reinforce the idea in case we were foggy on the specifics or didn’t believe him.
Andrea and Merle play catch up and then Merle like really wants a Thank You for saving them at gun point. She does and he relents.
I don’t know. That part was kind of weird. We then meet, officially, The Governor who is super charming in a zompocalypse dictator kind of way.
We get to see Woodbury and it’s like a suburban small town. We get a show of force to show how in control they are and how well Merle can shoot regardless of having a wrist stump. Later, Michondrea get a room of their own with fresh linens, bottled water and chocolate cherries (did I see that right?) The Governor says good night and we like him because he’s saying and doing all the right things, but there’s something off because no one in the zompocalypse says and does all the right things. If someone does, it’s because they’re truly disturbed and they are trying to act normal. Is this the case for the Governor or is he a legit good dude?
Back from commercial and it’s sunny Woodbury with people lounging and marketing and even some people doing landscaping.
The Governor visits the pilot who they saved and the pilot tells them about the rest of his crew and the Govenor is like, “Tell me where they are and I’ll totally find them.” And the pilot is like, “Ok,” but something feels wrong like he doesn’t really want to find them or he does but he wants to prank them really bad or something.
The governor goes into some secret lab where they gather info and intelligence and the head scientist wants to talk to Michondrea. They have a kind of tense breakfast where clearly they want something from Michondrea (to stay?) and Michonne mainly wants to go. Something happens and the Governor has to go.
Back from commercial, Michondrea stroll through Woodbury and their farmer’s market and the chamber of commerce and Michonne tells us that “My sh*t never stopped being together.” Awesome. Michondrea split up and it’s tense or something.
The Governor shows up at the pilot’s camp and he’s throwing up the white flag and everything feels great like they are going to join forces and life will be great and oh wait the Governor is shooting the guy and then everyone is getting shot.
For a military group, these guys are not too great with the ambushing. They stand around like there’s a strobe light going off and it’s a rave, but that’s not the case because they are outside and this is a zompocalypse so no one has a strobe light anymore.
Anyways, everyone is dead, the Governor beats some guys’ head in with the butt of a gun because if we weren’t TOTALLY sure that he was psycho, that pretty much did it. And then he goes and tells Bizarro Glenn to go knife some guy in the head for lolz.
Back from commercial and the rescue crew is back with no persons (because they murdered them all, remember?) and the Governor makes a speech where he lies, which is clearly a metaphor for the Libya situation right now I’m guessing.
Andrea is all flirty with the Governor and she’s like, “(giggle) What’s your name?” and he’s like, ” (Goodhearted chuckle) I never tell.” And Andrea is like “LOL, never say never.” And then the Governor is like, “Surly psycho-rude face) NEVER.” And punctuates that exchange much like a super crazy person would.
The Governor retires to his apartment where he presumably sleeps with a woman and then goes into his mancave to stare at an Aquarium Pyramid of Zombie Heads. Nothing strange or unsettling about that whatsoever.
Best Visual Representation of Carl’s Stupid Face to Sum Up The Episode
Lori’s Worstness Rating
4.5 (We have to assume that while this was happening, she was still being the worst back at the prison.)
What did you think about the Governor?